Eddas in a Nutshell – For performance at the Gudvangen Summer Market 2019
There is a ‘How To’ guide at the foot but basically we will be performing these in many languages.
The god of light and beauty
Balder was beautiful
Watch the twist of mistletoe fly through the air
Balder is dead – dead
Screaming silently forever
Lady Hel Herself holds him… Hahahahahaha
Unless everyone cries
Except one giantess… Hahahahahaha
Really it is Loki… Hahahahahaha
Balder stays dead
What ever happened to happy endings!
The pool of wisdom is guarded
But Mimir the guardian is just a head
Kept alive by magical herbs nudge nudge wink wink
“I can see you. Who are you?”
It is the big boss god of all the Viking gods
He who sometimes has an echo
Odin – No hang on I’ve said his name wrong
(Everybody all together 123) Ooooooooodin (Hand to ear)
He will drink from the pool of wisdom
(Mumbled) “No hang on, you have to pay!”
“What do I have to pay?”
(Mumbled) You have to poke out one of your eyes
So Odin poked out one of his eyes
We are about to drink from the pool of wisdom
Some of you clearly need it
(Everybody all together 123)
Angraboda had a baby
It was a gnashing roaring monstrous beast
Hear Fenrir the wolf…
Go near him and he will bite off your head
He rips off hands
Trick him and he howls
Dark elves fashion silken fetters
Trapped; he growls till Ragnarok
At last he bursts free
He is massive
His jaws reach the sky
Fenrir swallows Odin (gulp)
Odin kills as he dies
Fenrir dies in agony
Thor’s hammer is heavy
See we throw
Watch Mjolnir fly wuvwuvwuvwuvwuv
It hits (Bumf)
It comes back
We kill giants ‘Aaaaaaargh’
Trolls and troll-wives
Wolf-children in the Iron Wood
Yet this is the hammer which blesses the baby
Inspires the bride
Nourishes your yearnings
We throw it now at you loins
Wooohooo Haha Yayhey
You humans had better look out
The ravens are watching
See they fly high
They can tell if you are naughty
They peep into your chamber
The ravens know what you are thinking
Hugin and Munin
Thought and memory
They fly out from the shoulders of Odin
Oooooops I’ve said his name wrong – everybody – Ooooooodin
They return to tell him all about you! (Point)
This is what they say about you…
Caw caw caw
Winter upon winter upon freezing winter
Everyone goes mad
Let’s get physical
Roosters call – listen to the cock crow
Anger overcomes us
Gods go to war
Fire, weapons and poison
Cry out in fear as you die
We are dead dead dead dead dead
See, the sun is rising
Here are the previous ones…
‘How to’ guide:
If you are working with children they can repeat each line altogether after you and act it out; remember, many of the stories from the mythology are quite gruesome.
The multi-national story; you need people who speak different languages (and English) you can also encourage different dialects for a bit more fun. You say each of the lines and one at a time they saying along the row in their own language. It works wonderfully well, it works far better than it should! Prepare to have great fun.
Norse Gods and Goddesses Prose Poems – #21 Iðun’s Apples
A stunning new approach to the myths the Vikings loved; enlightening and challenging for the novice and veteran alike.
The Gods and Goddesses of the Nordic Mythos Prose Poems were created following research for Gods Bless Ya!! Rock Opera with Alda and Sigrun Bjork Olafsdottir and a forth-coming book with SigRun Viking Art & Design.
“Let us have another adventure!” “Let’s be humans again and travel off away in Midgard.” Oðin and Hænir readily agreed and off they went. Again as it was with Oðin he was shocked to feel the pain of hunger and wondered what could be done. “If you light a fire I will soon return with food, Hænir come with me,” called Loki.
When they returned Hænir was struggling to carry a huge Oxen. Oðin placed it upon a spit and they sat and watched it cook. They sat and watched it cook. They sat and watched it cook. “It isn’t cooking” “It is just as raw as it was before.”
“Something is working against us.”
“Something up here.”
Above upon a branch sits a great eagle, far too big to be believed.
“Let me eat my fill and all the meat will be cooked.”
As soon as they agreed the eagle swooped and took the lot.
Loki was enraged and leapt upon the huge creature with a great branch to strike upon its back. The branch struck, it stuck in his hand, the eagle flew, he took Loki hanging behind. How Loki squealed. The eagle gave him quite a ride, dragging him through tree tops. Scraping him along the ground. Across the glacier. Till Loki wild with agony had hardly any skin upon his back and knees. ”You will help me or I will not let you go.” “I promise; I will do anything.” “Bring me the beautiful Iðun and her powerful apples.” “This I cannot do.” The eagle dragged him over rocks, over glacier, through the trees, the rocky ground. “I will do anything. I will do this thing you ask. I promise.”
Within the week the orchard garden had a visitor. “Iðun, beautiful, Iðun you would never believe what I have seen. Come with me, come with me. Golden apples just like these. Golden apples on a tree. Ooooo bring these.” So Iðun went with him. The eagle swooped and had her. Took her with her apples to his immense castle. Yes this was Thiazi, mighty giant.
Oh how the Gods would suffer. In no time at all they crumbled, bumbled, mumbled, stumbled. Muttering they cluttered up the place in their old age. As memory faded Oðin wondered who it was who was missing.
Someone remembered the beauty of Iðun.
Someone remembered the beauty of Frejya, “She has gone.”
“No I am here,” said a bald old lady in the corner.
“There was another one though. A trickster one.” “Where is he?”
They found Loki, found him sleeping, tied him, bound him. “Bring her back to us!” Frejya stripped off her gown of feathers, “Fly as falcon Trickster One, and bring her back to us.” It was easy, Thiazi and his daughter Skaði had gone fishing. He landed, cast a spell and Iðun was a nut. He popped her in his pocket. Put on his feathers and flew away safely. No. Thiazi came back. It is a long long way to Asgard and Eagles are faster than Falcon. Thank the gods for ravens, Oðin’s ravens saw and warned and all the gods build pyres of firewood. As Loki flew over and in the gods lit fires, bursting flames on the monstrous Giant in his eagle form. He fell down and stumbling old gods they fell upon.
Oh how they laughed to see Iðun back and handing round her apples.
The Viking Life -This 21 chapter on-line book is my Autobiography
To read the first chapter simply click ‘Viking Life’.
At the top of each page you will see ‘Next in Current Series’. Just go back up to that and click to go to the next chapter each time.
Meanwhile I will get on with the follow up.
I was thrilled to be asked along to Preston Hall and Gardens in Yarm near Stockton to tell stories around the theme of spring and easter, managed to mix new stories with a few of my rarer ones and of course some of my better known ones too.
(And the songs of Odin and the words of Jesus too)
(then Vikings in prayer followed by the hatching of a baby chick – see pic below)
I think my favourite moment was when a lad of about 12 insisted he was a doctor so he could be the one to assist the chick in being born from its egg.
And so the words seemed to echo around the hill,
“As I have loved you, so must you love one and other.”
“Ask and it will be given to you; search, and you will find; knock, and the door will be opened for you.”
“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you.”
“All my commandments are summed up in this single command: You must love your neighbour as yourself.”
“Be meek and gentle and the world shall be yours.”
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